Manners Monday: Elevator Etiquette

While spending quite a bit of time riding elevators recently during this last cruise, I realized that what might seem common courtesy to most, is not, as many did not use proper elevator etiquette on our ship. Even the Comedian aboard our ship incorporated this lack of manners in his routine by informing everyone that it is polite to let everyone off first before attempting to enter an elevator. 

Upon getting to the Ft. Lauderdale airport to grab a rental car and head home, we were greeting by a woman who was trying to force her bags into the elevator we were in without even taking into account the fact that we were trying to get off on her floor. Whether in an office building, airport, residential elevator, or hotel, I've personally experienced this lack of manners numerous times so I got to thinking it might be time to make this the next Manners Monday post.

How to Ride a Lift: Proper Elevator Etiquette

1. How to Enter an Elevator-While waiting to board, stand away from the door. Under no circumstances should you enter unless you are sure no one is getting off on your floor. If someone needs to get off, allow them the space to do so before attempting to board. The people exiting the elevator ALWAYS have the right-of-way.

In general those standing closest to the door should be allowed to board first. Gentlemen should allow ladies to board first if it is practical. Determine if there is enough room for you and your buffer space before entering, each person should have double their size for personal space.

During busy times, you may have to board a car that is crowded. Wait for others to invite you in either verbally or by making room for you, don't insist on entering a crowded car that makes everyone uncomfortable. If you are with others, you may have to wait for another car or separate so you can all reach the destination floor in a timely manner.

2. Where to Stand Inside the Elevator- Always stand as close to a wall as possible. Consider your destination stop and stand towards the back if you are going to a high floor. If you will be getting off shortly, stand toward the front. Always be sure to face the elevator doors, it's poor etiquette to have your back facing the elevator door and essentially staring a stranger in the face, that invades someone's private space. Leave ample space between yourself and other passenger and do not make eye contact.

If you end up standing near the buttons, be aware that you may become responsible for pressing the floor buttons for others. Be sure to offer to press the buttons for those entering the elevator after you. This protocol alleviates people trying to reach across others and makes it easy for those who cannot reach it. Regardless of your location, if you are asked by another to press a button, it is proper to follow that request or inform the person standing closest if it isn't you. 

3. Do's & Don'ts Inside an Elevator

Do not keep others waiting by holding the door for someone that you are waiting upon. In an empty elevator it is considered polite to hold the doors for someone that is running toward the car.

If you are using an elevator while under the weather, consider waiting for an empty elevator car. Germs can be transferred very easily in close quarters so if you have to cough or sneeze, keep your mouth covered and refrain from touching the buttons if at all possible. 

It is NEVER acceptable to smoke in an elevator.

If you board an elevator with your significant other,  do not engage in a public display of affection while there are other passengers present, hand-holding is appropriate. Intimate relations in an empty elevator are not at all appropriate. Nobody will want to see what you two were up to when the doors open. Never use the emergency stop button for the purpose of getting intimate, save it for the bedroom.

Conversations in elevators are generally discouraged. However, if you began a conversation before getting into the elevator, especially with a colleague or someone getting off on a floor different from your destination, be sure to lower your voice and finish it as quickly as you can. Those who follow cell phone etiquette know that mobile phone conversations are a no-no, end them before you get into an elevator where you're not likely to maintain reception anyhow.

While striking up conversations with strangers in an elevator is not proper protocol, it is acceptable and a nice gesture to say "good morning" or "hello" upon entering out of politeness, but it is by no means necessary.

If you need to take  luggage onto an elevator, wait for an empty car if possible. If the car you enter is occupied, before entering make sure there is enough room for both you and your bags without violating others' personal space. Try to remain close to the doors with baggage to eliminate inconveniencing others by having them shift for your sake.

4. Riding in an Elevator with Children

Keep children close to you at all times and don't allow them to move or touch other passengers. If you have a baby with a "full" diaper that you can smell, or a small child that is throwing a tantrum, taking a stroller up the stairs is not an option so it's best to do everyone a favor and wait for the next empty car.

It's best not to encourage small children to press the numbered panel for your own floor while other riders are present. If they press more than your number, you'll be stopping at every floor and the other passengers will not be impressed.

5. How to Exit an Elevator

Gentlemen should allow ladies to exit the elevator first unless they are blocking the doors on a crowded elevator.

In a crowded elevator, when you are not close to the door, politely announce to others that the it's your floor and excuse yourself while making your way through the crowd, do not push.

If you are standing in the middle of the exit and the passenger who needs to exit, move out of the way as best as you can. It may sometimes be necessary to actually exit the elevator, allow them to leave and then re-enter. You might want to let others in the car know you'll be getting back on so the door doesn't close without you.

What's the most common lack of etiquette you've encountered while riding an elevator?

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What I Learned About Myself During Our Vacation

Hello Friends! I'm back and am so looking forward to connecting with you again! As I mentioned in my last post, it was time for the hubbs and I to get some R&R time away, especially after he's been busy writing his thesis so he can graduate and I recently left the company I was working for and the crazy schedule that eventually came with it- 7:30pm-3:30am shifts for the past 2 months had taken a toll on me. So, we packed our bags and drove down to Ft. Lauderdale where our cruise ship to the Caribbean awaited us for the next 10 days. We visited Antigua, St.Lucia, Barbados, St. Kitts, St. Thomas and the cruise ship's private island in The Bahamas which you might have already seen a pic of hubby and I in if you follow The Classy Woman Facebook page.

One of the perks to being married to a Professional Speaker is that he gets invited to many different cities, countries and venues and I get to tag along. As an Author of a variety of topics, he gets asked all the time to speak on cruise ships as their guest Lecturer on an array of topics during the at sea days. While the cruises aren't entirely free it makes seeing new destinations extremely affordable and living in Florida is a huge plus because we have so many ports to depart from. Airfare isn't necessary which makes stuffing my suitcases that much easier since I don't have to worry about weight restrictions for my many pairs of shoes in their respective boxes-yes I'm particular like that. ;) I can do many things well but packing light isn't one of them...yet.

While relaxation and fun was the goal, I had not anticipated that by the end of the trip I would have so many new lessons learned, but I did. Although not always easy to share weaknesses, since I value personal growth and being transparent with others and because I know most people can learn a lot through others' experiences/lessons, I thought I'd share them with you, maybe they'll help you to evaluate your own life also. Here we go! Prepare yourself for a L-O-N-G post...this is what I learned about myself during our 10 days away.

Lessons Learned:


1. What you Want isn't Always What You Need- The very first cruise that hubby worked on, I had anticipated the worst for our accommodations (after all, he was working on the ship) so I set my expectations pretty low so that I wouldn't be disappointed. To my surprise and delight, that first glorious cruise we were set up with a sweet ocean view cabin-it was an even bigger room than on previous ships that we had had a balcony-it was awesome. The next one I set my expectations low again especially since we were cruising at such a busy time-Christmas & New Year's, and we were in fact provided with an inside cabin which simply means it's the smallest cabin (or so I thought) and it does not have a window or balcony. It was a little weird not getting to see the sun rise/set and see our arrival into a new port but heck, we were at sea for 14 days so we pushed the two individual beds together and made a queen size bed for ourselves. ;)

For some reason, even though it was a cruise during Easter, I somehow felt like we might have a nice sized cabin waiting for us. However, when they handed us two cruise cards each upon arrival of this ship, I just knew things were going to be different this time around as I read though our paperwork. We found our room and as I turned the handle and peered inside my heart sank when I saw it was a crew cabin with....wait for it......bunk beds! LOL. It was the tiniest cabin we had ever stayed in and with both of us not ones to pack lightly I had wondered where we were going to store all of our stuff and not go crazy over the next 10 days, especially with no window. I moved my bags into a corner out of the way and decided to leave the cabin, partly to give my hubbs a chance to unpack some of his stuff alone and give him some space and also give me space to get over my immediate feelings of disappointment. I headed to the other decks to check out the pool and spa only to learn that the discounts we previously received on other ships for shopping, spa, and fancy drinks didn't apply on this ship. For a brief moment I felt that disappointed and then suddenly remembered something my dad used to tell me as a young girl. While he always promoted dreaming big, he'd often say, "If you don't set your expectations so high, you will be less likely to get disappointed". And how true it was in this case. As I walked around the ship I told myself to snap out of my funky feeling, after all our room was just for sleeping hours and showering, we were blessed to have such an opportunity. There are bigger problems in life to contend with then one's stateroom!

I realized that in ways, I had become a bit....dare I say...spoiled with having such a fab room out of the gates a few cruises back. It's hard to go backwards sometimes when you've experienced something greater. I do realize that some people will never go on a cruise or a vacation at all in their lifetime, I had much to celebrate and forced myself to be grateful for everything that we did have-10 days together away from home, a cabin in a quiet area away from the elevators, great meals that I didn't have to prepare, 5 new destinations we hadn't been to before (we were in St. Thomas on a previous cruise), sunshine, beautiful beaches and hubby's opportunity to expand his growing roster of cruise lines.

It turned out that our lack of space actually brought us closer together as we laughed, made jokes about our bunk beds and other bits of our circumstances during the trip. We hadn't laughed that much on any other cruise. The space for our stuff? Turns out that the Officer's cabin we stayed in had a lot of storage space, just as much as the other rooms with under-bunk storage. Even still, Most of my items that don't wrinkle easily like jeans stayed in my suitcase during the trip making packing to go home a breeze! Sometimes the circumstances we want to fight, don't feel we deserve or don't understand make us better, helping us to become more grateful for previous wonderful opportunities or circumstances.

2. Don't be Afraid of Looking Silly- Looking forward to the beaches of our first destination in Antigua, I spent more time in the water than I should have. The glass-like water was so stunning that I enjoyed 3 hours straight in it followed by lunch. After re-applying sunblock many times, I thought I had myself covered but the nasty sunburn that appeared later that day revealed otherwise. My shoulders, face, neck, back and chest looked like a lobster and boy did that make sleeping unbearable for the upcoming days-bunk beds actually proved to be helpful for us on this particular trip! Since we didn't pre-purchase excursions this time as we normally do, we decided to play it by ear. Sadly, I couldn't do much that involved being in the sun. Mostly I stayed covered up in the shade with a big floppy hat and halter dresses as to not put pressure on my red, hot shoulders followed by a long sleeved linen shirt over top and zinc sunblock everywhere else. I looked a bit silly to be honest but the health of my skin was more important than fashion.

When we hit our last destination, my skin was healing and although peeling, was looking much better. I was not going to miss the snorkel opportunity in Bahamas as I sat out of other possible snorkel adventures due to my intense burn. There I was with my 3/4 length sleeve bathing suit cover-up on, a mask and snorkel over top of my white-ish face covered with zinc oxide sunblock, hair in a bun messed up by putting on my mask and trying to navigate my way into what I learned from hubby who was already in the water, was a beach shore filled with rocks. As I forewarned another couple about the rocks which were hard to see, the guy who responded kind of looked at me with a smirk looking at my getup. I was there to see fish, and fish I was going to see!  As I entered the water and swam over the rocks hubby scooped me up and went in for a kiss and joked "only a face a husband could love" as we tried to kiss with his hat brim and my snorkel mask in the way- we were laughing hysterically, a fine looking pair that day! Thankfully all of the prep work paid off, there were lots of beautiful fish, huge sea fans and coral to be seen and I don't regret looking silly for one moment. We all want to look our best and present our best self, but sometimes it just doesn't work out that way. The perfect situation is over-rated, being silly is what creates funny stories and leaves lasting memories.

3. I've Become a More Patient Person- Sharing a tiny cabin, and an even smaller bathroom (when we don't share one at home), and trying to get into the same closet as we got dressed for dinner was tricky. We usually did things in shifts. He'd work out at the gym while I got ready since he always gets ready at warp speed. I would walk around the shops before we ate or read a book in one of the lounges. Perhaps it was the vacation atmosphere, but I'd like to think I've made some progress, patience has been an area that I've been working on for a while.

As hubby and I have discussed having children in the next couple years, I've been praying for a while that God would help me to become a more patient woman so I can be the best possible wife and eventually mother also. It helps that I have a mostly patient husband who gives me grace when I need it.


5. I Need to Stop Pre-Judging Situations- The night before we arrived at the cruise ship's private island, we discussed what we wanted to do once we were there. We had decided to spend that day snorkeling but I knew I didn't want to stay there for more than a few hours. When we sailed on a previous cruise line a few years ago, their private island beach was okay but nothing to write home about, hubby agreed. I had just assumed that most of the private beach areas were more or less the same. We agreed to head to the beach around noon time allowing everyone else to get off the ship and we could eat breakfast with far less people around.

That morning we took our time getting out of bed and heading to breakfast, there we saw the beach from a distance. When we finally decided to head over, we learned that the last tender boat would pick everyone up at 3:30pm, which wasn't much time since we dilly-dallied. When we arrived, it was so beautiful-brightly painted cabanas, little shops that I wasn't expecting, a much larger beach with gorgeous white sand and many more places for people to lounge. There I was, taking in the beautiful scenery but all the while I was mad at myself. Why? Because I had preconceived notions about what this little beach area would be and as a result, I missed out on spending several more hours at such a lovely spot. While I don't pre-judge people, I realized in that moment that I do tend to spend too much time thinking about how things will be or how they'll turn out, even on vacation. I need to let go of presumptions and pre-judging situations just because something similar wasn't so great (once again my over-analytical brain at work). I'm looking forward to being more open to all opportunities and take things as they come instead of ruling them out before I've even experienced them.

5. I'm more in love with my husband than ever before-We've had our ups and downs like any couple but I can honestly say that our first year married was not the lovey-dovey rainbows and butterflies kind of newly married life that we had envisioned. At times I questioned whether I made the right decision as I'm sure he did as well. It was a frustrating time which was intensified by the fact that I had moved to a new country with all of my close friends and family thousands of miles away.  We can both be stubborn, we're both very independent and very driven. I also have a need for things to be organized that hubby cannot relate to-his office door is the only one that stays shut for this reason-he admits he's a disorganized clutter bug. These things aren't always a great recipe for a good relationship and I had struggled to make his home feel like mine as his grandparents raised him in the house we live in today.

The past few months since he's been home for NYU have been amazing, not to say that other times weren't but we feel connected and committed to each other more than ever. Somehow, it was all magnified for me on this trip as we laughed our way though circumstances. Seeing my husband speaking in front of everyone on his lecturing days at sea made me so proud too, he's so talented, a very hard worker and has such a heart for people. I feel really blessed to have him in my life. While many relationships start strong and fizzle out years later, I'm glad ours started out with all of its challenges. It has given us perspective and we now know how committed we are to one another. Five and a half years in, it's as if the mountain we've been climbing has ended and we've suddenly arrived at the top with the brightest view of our future.

Being on a ship and seeing many elderly couples reminded me of how short life truly is. There's no time like the present to make things happen, we are given each day as a gift. Sometimes there are things we can do best in our current decade than we cannot in future decades, my goal for the rest of the year is to make sure I'm maximizing on all of those things to avoid having regrets later.

Are you still with me? Oh, good you are. If you're up for more reading, if you've been missing our Manners Monday posts on etiquette, or if you're planning on taking a cruise soon yourself, he're a post on Cruise Ship Etiquette.


Anyone getting ready to take a trip or just come back from one?
What things have you learned about yourself recently? I'd love to hear from you! :)




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Taking Some Time For R&R

Hello Lovelies! Sorry for the sporadic posts, sometimes life just gets so crazy, doesn't it? I still can't even comprehend how all of you mamas do it! The hubbs and I have been working very hard lately and it is time for us to take a break. We need some R&R together to reconnect after his long 18 months living out of state for school.

We're also celebrating. As some of you know, he is completing his Master's Degree this Summer and is in the final stages of completing his thesis. I just finished a full time job of 8 months to finally come back to what I love doing most-writing and interior design. Yay! :)

My big plan was to leave you with a post every few days while I'm away from my desk but between enjoying the gorgeous weather here and taking care of some unplanned things around the house, I wasn't left with any time.

I hope you'll all hang in there, now that my schedule is my own again, I look forward to providing a lot of exciting, new content on a  regular basis. Thank you for sticking with me and I'll chat with you again soon!

XO



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Manners Monday: Airplane Etiquette

I know that some of you are probably traveling with your children during their spring break vacation. So, in the spirit of spring break, I thought it would be appropriate to post about travel etiquette, in particular airplane etiquette as many fly during this time of the year towards warmer weather.

Here are a list of essential etiquette tips to be mindful of while flying to make both yours and the other passengers' flight more enjoyable:

Boarding the Plane

Every airline is a bit different in how they board passengers. Generally there are sections whereby they call specific rows up, allowing first class passengers to board first then families with small children and the elderly. It's important to go up only once your section has been called as to keep things flowing smoothly. If your section was already called upon before you arrived to the gate, it is usually okay to board but ask the gate attendant before doing so. Be careful to keep a healthy distance between you and the person in front of you as to not clip the heels of the person in front of you with rolling carry-on luggage.

Carry-on bags & Overhead Storage

The greatest challenge with carry-on bags is making it through the aisle carefully as to not bump others who are already seated as well as those in front of you when they stop suddenly. The best way to do avoid this is by rolling your bag forward straight in front of you or if carrying a shoulder bag, do so in front of you vs. on your shoulder where it is likely to hit someone in the head. I often lift and carry my rolling carry-on bag in front of me to be the most efficient and avoid hurting others. Once you become seated, be sure to keep your arms and legs within your row as to not get bumps and bruises by others who will likely be paying less attention.

Keep a distance of 3 feet while walking down the aisle. Those walking ahead will need to stow their baggage overhead and may need to have a middle or aisle seat passenger step out into the aisle so that they can get into a middle or window seat, they'll need some extra space.

Once you reach your seat, place your bag into the overhead compartment next to other existing bags, being careful to not shove it in with force as others may have stowed fragile items above. If you have a secondary bag such as a laptop bag, large handbag, etc., store it under the seat in front of you. Also make sure that you have everything that you'll likely need from your carry-on bag to place into the secondary bag for your flight (this is best done while waiting at the gate before getting onto the plane) as it will limit your need to get out of your seat for things you suddenly realize you want. Such items would include: books, magazines, iPod, notebook & pen, gum/mints, tissues, earplugs, eye mask, prescription medication or vitamins.

Getting Seated

From time to time while flying you may be approached by another passenger asking to switch seats with you. It is your seat to do as you wish with, so if you are happy with where you've been assigned, the polite thing to say to turn the other passenger down gently would be, "I'm sorry, but I'd really prefer to stay in this seat". If you're not partial to your seat, it would be a kind gesture especially if you're traveling alone and it would allow a couple or parent and child to sit together, particularly for longer flights.

If you are the one who would like to switch seats with someone or move to an unoccupied seat, be sure to wait until all other passengers have boarded the plane which is signified by the airplane door being closed. If you are unsure about a seat, it's best to ask a flight attendant. If another passenger turns down your request to switch, thank them kindly and quickly move back to your original seat, be sure to excuse yourself if you have move past other passengers in your row.

Your seat is yours to recline but it's best to only do so after you're given the okay to no longer be in the upright position during take off. Inch your seat back carefully as to not hit the knees of someone behind you. It's always polite to let the passenger behind know that you intend to recline the seat a bit. Try to avoid doing this while meals are served as tray tables will be down and space will be limited as is.


Making Conversation with Passengers

One of the things I've always loved about flying is the uninterrupted (for the most part) reading or resting time. It doesn't always work out that way though. You may not be in the mood to chat with fellow passengers in your row and that is precisely when someone wants to strike up a conversation.

Always be polite and smile, however if you want to keep the conversation short, it's best to let them know that you've enjoyed chatting with them and then let them know you'd like to spend the flight time reading, sleeping or working. Thank them for understanding. Chatting is a kind and friendly gesture that makes those around you feel comfortable but be careful if you are beginning the conversation that you don't infringe on their personal time.  On the flip side, I've also spent many short flights with lovely people that have fascinating stories that I can remember to this day so if you're up for it, it's a great way to pass the flight time!


Children In-Flight

If you are a parent traveling with a baby or small child you will want to do everything you can to ensure that your precious one is not disturbing other passengers. Planning is key before the flight so items like coloring books and crayons, small toys, stickers and snacks that they love will help along the way. If they kick the seat in front of them, be sure to apologize and if the child is old enough, have them also apologize and try to have them refrain from doing it again. Try to feed and change a baby immediately before boarding if possible to avoid crying and more work for you on the plane.

If you are the passenger sitting near a child that is kicking your seating or throwing small items like candy your way (I've been there before), politely let the parent know that you realize they may be unaware, but their child has been making the flight uncomfortable for you. By carrying earplugs or listening to music, it will help drown out any excess noise if you are in a noisy area and there are no available seats to move to instead. Try to remind yourself that while an inconvenience, the flight is a few hours and not forever, try to make the best of the situations. If things do become unbearable though, it is entirely appropriate to seek the help of a flight attendant.

Other Important Tips

~Refrain from using anything with a strong scent, including fast food or food with garlic. Keep perfume etiquette in mind and it's best to avoid highly fragranced lotions and other items on a plane as it is an enclosed space which could trigger allergies in some. Likewise, the use of permanent markers like sharpies or nail polish are absolutely a no-no while on a plane as they are toxic. Hygiene is important, clean clothes and showering the day of your flight is a must, your fellow passengers will thank you!

~Be understanding if a passenger in your row repeatedly asks you to get up to let them out. You never know if someone has a medical condition, feels under the weather or just drank a lot of liquids before boarding the plane. Be gracious and kind as you might be on the asking end one day. If you are seated in an aisle seat, it might be easiest to switch spots with that passenger.

~Keep all items and reading materials you're using in your own space, avoid having it spill out onto the seat next to you.

~Don't be nosy, avoid reading over someone else's shoulder, or watching someone else's in-seat TV screen from your seat instead of  your own, it's best to keep to yourself and allow others privacy.

~Like libraries, airplanes should be a quiet environment. Keep talking volume down to a minimum as to not disturb others. If you are traveling with a child, be sure they keep video games and talking to a quiet level also.

~If you need to get up to use the restroom, don't hesitate to ask the passenger next to you so they can let you out.  If someone is sleeping, do it gently by saying "excuse me" and if necessary lightly tapping them on the arm.

~Avoid spending too much time in the lavatory to keep others from waiting. It's not the place for applying full makeup or anything that requires a lengthy stay. A full freshening up can always be done after landing in a much more comfortable sized restroom in the airport. After using it, be sure to leave it the same way if not neater than how you found it.

I hope you found these tips helpful. Many find traveling exhilarating while others find it stressful. Either way, being prepared and aware of what to expect is key!

Speaking of being prepared, here are some items that you don't want to leave home without on your next trip!

Is anyone going to be flying soon? If so, where are you headed to?




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Turn Your Can'ts into Cans!

Today I posted this little quote onto my Facebook page and I wanted to share it with all of you. (I hope you'll pop by to join our daily conversations, a reader commented and gave a great book recommendation today on this topic, thanks Sheilah!)

I think we should remove the word "can't" from our vocabulary, it's such a limiting word, isn't it?  I love how happy and cheery this quote is. It's also a great reminder that we are the ones that hold the power to change our negative thoughts into positive ones. It is a decision every day. We must DECIDE to only entertain the positive thoughts and envision ourselves as achieving the very things that we feel we cannot.

Only when we change our mindset can we turn our someday 'dreams' into plans.

Today's post is a short one, more posts to come this week! Have a lovely Wednesday! :)




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