Behind Every Gentleman is a Lady

As Valentine's Day approaches I've been thinking about love and relationships. Some say that we get what we give in life while many are convinced that we attract what we are. Others like Oprah and Maya Angelou through experience have learned that, "We teach others how to treat us". I believe these are all true statements.

How we communicate with those around us (in particular the men in our lives) shows them how we would like to be treated. It also provides a clue as to what we value (and if we value and respect ourselves at all). While it is not our responsibility per se, as women I believe our actions & behavior prompt a man's desire to be more chivalrous and refined. If this is true, we hold great power with our actions and words to positively transform a large population of men who have forgotten what it truly means to be a gentleman. 

What do YOU think? The image above is what I posted on Facebook today and the comment/question that I posed, I've never seen so much feedback in just one hour! Pop by and see for yourself. Now, I'd love to hear your thoughts and personal experiences by leaving a comment below or feel free to join the conversation with us on our Facebook Page.

I don't know about you but with the man in my life, I've learned that when I shower him with love, I get it back; when I show an increased level of respect, I receive more in return; when I make time for him, he sets aside some time for me also; when I demand more of myself to be my best for him, he raises the bar for himself also to be his best for me. Of course the opposite of this is true as well. Ladies, let's be leaders because behind every gentleman is a lady, whether it be his wife, mother or girlfriend.

 

Wishing you a wonderful rest of your week! :)

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Can We Really Have & Do it All?

 

This is a question I've put a lot of thought into over the years. As I go about each day, make plans for the next, dream big, accomplish goals and multi-task with the best of them-I often ask myself, "Just how much can we really have and do"? Can we have it all, and at once? Celebrities make it look simple enough but even Oprah, whose built quite an empire during her lifetime, has shared that women can have it all, just not all at once. With every year that passes, it is made abundantly clear to me that now more than ever there is still so much I want to do, have, see and become. That is where a great little book comes in.

A few months ago I found a woman named Christine Caine via Twitter as she was placed on Twitter's home page of top tweets. The quotes and wisdom she tweeted about drew me in for more, and I immediately became a follower. Later, I visited her website and stumbled upon her book titled: 'Can I have and do it all, please?'  I knew that was a book for me. A few short days later it arrived in the mail and I read it from cover to cover. I have nothing but praises to sing of this book!

Christine is a wife, mother, author, professional speaker, world traveler and founder of a thriving ministry called Equip and Empower. She is one busy woman! After speaking at countless women's events, she started to see a trend when opening up questions to the audience-they all wanted to know virtually the same thing-How she has created a life where she can have and do it all. She finally decided to write a book  that answers the many questions that women all over the world had been asking her for years.

From start to finish, I could relate to so many aspects of Christine's own story and her daily life adventures and misadventures. I really enjoyed her "tell-it-like-it-is," passionate and often humorous way of communicating messages of hope and inspiration. The advice she offers is timeless and is filled with powerful truths. As a woman in ministry, she also incorporates God's word and scripture to further point to these truths.  She covers everything from managing and enjoying relationships, thriving in your career, having your own identity, living with simplicity, riding through the seasons of life and the importance of knowing your life's purpose.

Christine has a way of relating to every woman. She is a breath of fresh air and I love that she is REAL, sharing both her triumphs and pitfalls, a dose of comedy as well as the keen ability to speak just the right words into your life. This is a fun, breezy read that will leave you feeling inspired and ready to tackle your own life and even endure challenges in a new way so that you can have and do everything that you dream of.

This book is for EVERY woman no matter what season or place she is at in her life. This book is not only empowering but also inspiring and liberating! I hope you'll check out Christine's book, it's available on AMAZON. It would make a fabulous gift for the women in your life!

How about you-do you struggle with trying to be superwoman? What are your secrets to having, doing and accomplishing all that you dream of?

Happy Friday!



*Please note that I was in no way paid or compensated for providing my thoughts and this review on Christine Caine's book. This is solely my opinion and personal experience and I am thrilled about sharing it with all of you!

Women, Food and God

Let me start off by saying that I never watch an Oprah show while it's airing at 4pm. I had turned the tv on this afternoon to make sure Sarah's House on HGTV was going to be recorded this Saturday via my  DVR. When the tv came on Oprah's show had begun and it really intrigued me. She had a special Author guest Geneen Roth with a wonderful new book.

I believe that this book has the ability to single handedly change the mindset that a lot of women are experiencing as it pertains to weight. Whether it's a battle with 100lbs or 10lbs, it's not the food that is the problem. It goes much deeper than that. You may have heard that concept before but I believe this book is dramatically different. Despite this post's title which is actually Geneen's book title, the book doesn't focus on God in the religious way that you might think. It is all about our inner longing for something greater, in causes us to look into our past to better understand how we can move forward and love ourselves as women, and so much more.

While doing the interview, Oprah was brought to tears because after many years of struggling with her weight and not really knowing what the deeper issue was, she was finally able to have one of her famous 'aha' moments and did not hold back from sharing it with the women of the world. She was able to pinpoint the exact time and belief from her childhood that she has channeled and let hold her back, it has prevented her from becoming the very best self that she has always dreamed of. Once again, just one reason why I view Oprah as the classy woman that she truly is. She doesn't proclaim to be perfect, with all of the world's celebration of her and her life achievements, even she was stumped as to what was holding her back from loving herself completely for so many yeas and from losing weight for good. That was until she read this book.

All of us as women want to be and feel beautiful, lovely, loved, desired, important, special, meaningful and the best version of ourselves. It's been a harder road for some than others. Many don't love themselves or see theselves as the beautiful women that they truly are because of a number on a scale or the size of their thighs. What's worse is that many women have passed on the same self-loathing to their daughters (and in some cases their sons too) without even realizing it. While it's true that father's play an important role and this can be passed down from them, it is generally women that are guilty of beating themselves up on an almost daily basis in the pursuit of achieving their ideal image of beautiful and thin in their mind.

The biggest message in this book is about loving yourself and kindness. Be kind to yourself. Look into your soul and feel who you truly are, not your mistakes, past disappointments or failures. One of the deep messages in this book was about feeling. We've all heard about how many alcoholics or drug addicts numb the pain of their current situation or past with these bandaids. Have you thought about your relationship with food? Many eat because they are bored, overwhelmed, in pain or worse-want to prevent actually feeling any pain at all. The feelings and pain that aren't experienced get buried for a while but actually double as the food attempts to cover it all up. Then not only is pain felt but so is dissatisfaction with one's self.

On a personal note, while I can't personally attest to having had a lifelong battle with weight or food; I will say that I have fallen into the category of eating when bored, overwhelmed or diving into a chocolate bar to temporarily de-stress from a crazy day. Like most women I have beaten myself up about a few pounds here or there from time to time. In my early twenties I did some modeling, an industry notorious for telling women that they are not good enough, thin enough for runway, not edgy enough for editorials, not pretty enough for commercial shoots, etc. During those three years I experienced a lot of highs and lows after every go see, audition and job. In some ways it changed the way I saw myself at that time.  While the photo shoots were a lot of fun and the money was really lucrative at times, I chose to move on and leave that world behind which I knew was in my best interest. Since I had started later in life, I was at least wise enough to know what was good for me and healthy and what just contributed negatively in some ways to my life.

If you get a chance to watch the later airing tonight of this show "Why Oprah says she'll Never Diet Again!", I highly encourage you to watch it or program it into your DVR. That link includes the page on Oprah's site which provides more information. Here is the link to the book, at just $12.99 on amazon I think it is a great investment that every woman struggling in this area should consider buying for themselves or even their daughters.

The purpose of life it to grow, love, renew ourselves and completely understand all that we were intended to be.

Have you read this book? What things have you learned about yourself in life over the years that have made you the woman you are today. Anonymous comments are always welcome. :)

Be well.

xo



P.S. Don't forget to enter our $50 Stationery Giveaway from Pear Tree Greetings!

It's Not The Circumstances, It's You!

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Do you feel frustrated by the state of the economy, your present weight, your job? Do you find yourself making excuses or blaming others for why you are in your present situation or circumstances? We've all been there and sometimes we recognize our actions more than other times. The great news is we are all capable of more and changing so we can take control of and better our lives.

Imagine what your life could be like if you stopped blaming your circumstances on other people and things and took responsibility of your own life. In Oprah's most recent e-newsletter, Mike Robbins gives you the tools you need to take control of your life and become more aware of your experiences.

Last year I subscribed to Oprah's Spirit Newsletter, while I don't read every single one, often I find some great little gems. Today, I wanted to share this topic with you because it affects ALL of us and determines how we live our life, experience our days and interact with those that we love.

This is a piece worth reading and reflecting upon inwardly. Since they are the words of Oprah's people and not me, I thought I'd create a link, you can read the full article HERE.

I also love this quote (which is also in the article) by Ben Franklin:

"Joy doesn't exist in the world, it exists in us." 

That is so empowering! How many times do we think about what we want, and sometimes feel sad when we cannot have it? That quote is proof that no matter what your circumstances, financial situation or present age, we are all capable of being completely happy and filled with joy, but it is our choice to bring that feeling and experience forth!

In a similar vein, I love this quote by spiritual teacher Byron Katie:

"The definition of insanity is thinking that you need something you don't have. The mere fact that you exist right now without that which you think you need is proof that you don't need it."


Before blackberries, iPhones, microwaves, laptops and big shiny SUV's came into our lives we got along just fine. We are always capable of living on less than we think or living without things we believe we need, it's just a matter of our comfort level and decision to do so.

Oprah's article really resonated with me as I can see some of these little things in my own life and the lives of my close family. I also realized that growing up, some of their thoughts and beliefs about circumstances shaped my life at an early age. Some great, some not so great.

I've definitely been guilty of that, in my own mind I had built up reasons why I haven't completed certain projects in our home or haven't spent more time at the gym. The truth is that I just didn't make time for it in the past. Nobody and nothing else helped me make those choices. I chose to do other things instead, it's my own fault and only I can make the changes I want to see happen. You might remember, I had a little wake up call a few weeks ago and realized that facebook was a contributor to some of these areas, as it can be a huge time sink. However, it is my discipline in using such social media tools and not the tools themselves that were the problem. Taking some time away however by de-activating my account for now, was just the discipline I needed in order to refocus and make my priorities exactly that.

Is there anything in your life you've felt as though you need (and can't presently have) that you truly know you can live without? Have you felt as though you've been blaming your circumstances, lack of motivation or results on someone or something?  Feel free to share anonymously if you like.

Have an awesome week!

Quotes by Oprah

Today's post is short and sweet, I'm sharing some of my favorite quotes from a classy woman that ALL of you know and many of you love-Oprah! I hope these 7 quotes will cause you to think about your own life and go after your dreams this year!

'Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.'

'My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.'

'The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams!'

'I believe the choice to be excellent begins with aligning your thoughts and words with the intention to require more from yourself.'

'There's no easy way out. If there were, I would have bought it. And believe me, it would be one of my favorite things!' (on exercise/losing weight)

'Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.'

'The key to realizing a dream is to focus not on success but significance - and then even the small steps and little victories along your path will take on greater meaning.'

~All quotes listed above by Oprah Winfrey.

What is your favorite quote? It doesn't have to be one from Miss. Winfrey, but I'd love to hear which ones you refer to when you need some inspiration!