Monday, July 9, 2012

Manners Monday: Blog Commenting Etiquette

Good Morning Ladies! I don't know about you but my weekend just flew by! Today's Manners Monday post was inspired by something that I've been thinking about for a while which is blog commenting etiquette. Not just because I'm a blogger myself but because I've often seen comments left for other bloggers, anonymous or named and I just feel something needs to be said.

As you know, I've always allowed Anonymous comments on this blog. Sometimes you just want to leave a comment about a touchy subject or one that is of a very personal nature and not always attach your name to it. Maybe it's regarding a strained relationship, lack of finances, failing health, etc. Thankfully, I haven't received many mean anonymous comments with the exception of two which I had to take the liberty to delete because they were angry rants and unnecessary. This brings me to point number one....




1. Leaving Anonymous Comments- If a blogger has chosen to afford readers the ability to leave an anonymous comment, be respectful. It's shameful how I've seen some people hide behind the cloak of anonymity making it easy for them to be rude, mean, negative and just all around nasty to the blog owner or even in the form of a reply towards others who have commented before them. Many seem to feel these days that because they cannot be seen behind their computer screen that it is okay. Hurtful comments can really bring someone down long after the offhand remark is type into the comment box. Do unto others as you would want them to do unto you.

2. Leaving Public Profile Comments- Some people have no shame, profile picture and name attached or not, they feel entitled to voice their opinion at the cost of someones feelings. It's all about them making sure their thoughts on a subject are heard. Likewise, they feel the same way about replying to others who have commented before them. A classy woman does not harm other people with her words and make them feel uncomfortable in an effort to ensure her viewpoints are made known. Be mindful of the fact that bloggers choose to put a lot of their personality, their family, maybe their home, their experiences and sometimes their faith into their posts and if you do not agree, simply do not comment. There's no need to start a war online. I'm constantly amazed by the people that attack another blogger's post content. I always think to myself that if they don't like it, why don't they just move on to another site they'll enjoy more?

3. Making the Effort to Comment- Nobody knows the importance of comments after a thoughtfully-written post like another blogger does. You see, there are many times that one pores over just the right images to use, often re-sizing them and using editing tools to pretty them up on top of the time spent writing and editing one's thoughts and speaking from the heart on certain matters. It's somewhat demoralizing to spend sometimes hours preparing a post and feel as though nobody is listening. I realize many blog readers are not blog writers themselves and therefore may not understand this side of the blog but it's something to be mindful of. While bloggers don't begin a blog for the purpose of applause or comments, rather it is their passion, interests, hobbies that keep them writing, everyone appreciates the connection that comes from interacting with their readers.

These days I find a lot of people are very much consumers. They see images or a great piece online and quickly read through it, get what they need and move on. It's such a selfish attitude in my opinion. I'm certainly not perfect in the commenting department but I do try to leave a few comments per day on other blogs after reading posts and visiting others via Facebook and Twitter to keep the relationships going or to say hello when discovering a new page.

4. Shameless Self-Promotion- There's nothing worse than having someone visit your blog only to promote themselves and that is all. You know the type, they include a link to their blog as if clicking on their profile name wouldn't simply take you there. They sometimes include their latest giveaway even though they don't really have much of a relationship with you and it can feel like spam. Likewise, most bloggers have an e-mail address so if you need to share something that doesn't need to be shared with a crowd via comments, just send a direct e-mail.

5. Blog Comment Reciprocation- As blog writers who know the importance of valuable, helpful comments and sometimes re-assuring and uplifting someone else if they've really put themselves out there with a personal topic or a video they've produced, it's kind to give them a quick lift by leaving a little message. Even if the blogger who left you a comment only has 22 followers, they are no less important than those who follow you and have 2200 followers. It really is common courtesy to say thank you for the post, let them know you visited and read their post and what your thoughts were. The bloggers that I connect with the most are always the ones who make the effort because you know what? It tells me that I'M worth their effort. Isn't that what manners are really all about anyway? Letting others know that you value them and want to make them feel comfortable and that they matter.


What are your thoughts on blog commenting etiquette?

XO



*Photo Credit: (1)

36 comments:

  1. I agree with everything you said. It's always nice to receive comments on your posts. I'm always thankful for them and enjoy when someone adds a personal experience that teaches me something. On that note, I wanted to share a really sweet thing that another blogger did recently: After leaving a comment on a favorite blogger's site she personally emailed me to thank me for being a loyal reader for the past couple of years-what a sweet gesture and great way to keep me coming back!

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    1. Karen, thank you so much for sharing this idea! I think it's fabulous and really doesn't take a lot of time or effort but the thoughtfulness behind it is so sweet. :) I'm sure that probably made your day! I can tell you are a loyal reader, commenter and friend. You've been one of my longstanding readers and you always comment. I've always appreciated that about you! :)

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  2. Thank you thank you thank you for this post, Karla! I've had way too many people feel that anonymity made it okay for them to say any hurtful thing that they please or felt that just because they had a strong opinion, they needed to share it with the world.

    I used to be one of those people as well. I hate to admit it, but I started TheProperLady.com not as someone who was always perfect and ladylike, but as someone who made a ton of mistakes and wanted to encourage others not to make those same mistakes, and also as someone who just wanted to improve herself! :) I come from a background that definitely gives me the resources to be a lady (my mother is a finishing school graduate who attended in the 60's and was very picky with teaching me flower arranging, baking, and etiquette) but I sure didn't take advantage of her lessons. I regret that very much and am trying to improve myself today and am hoping that I can help other young women who've made mistakes realize that apologizing and making amends is a better depiction of a lady than someone who's never made a mistake before. xo

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    1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us Nina! :) I am totally with you, I think it is so much more important to continually grow as a person and share your weaknesses through transparency as a teaching tool, it's what makes others feel that they can not only relate to you but that they don't need to be flawless to be a beautiful woman. I'm continuously a work in progress myself as we all are.

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  3. The self promotion is borderline tacky in my opinion (unless there is some genuine common interest that you share that they think you might be interested in sharing). Being a smaller blog writer, I don't really have to deal with the anonymous comments (I am so thankful for that! I'm not sure I have thick enough skin).

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    1. Thanks Sarah for stopping by and leaving a comment! While I still consider myself to be a 'smaller blog writer' too I can't even imagine what the big bloggers go through! Another option is to not allow anonymous comments which I did for some time a couple years ago after the meanies left their comment, that way I could approve them all first. ;)

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  4. This post is spot on! Many people have lost the ability to be civil, let alone classy. The ability to be anonymous is a big part of it, but you are right. Some people don't feel the need to hide. They are perfectly comfortable being ugly in the open. It's a sad state of affairs, if you ask me. Off to share this post...

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    1. Thank you Elizabeth for your sharing your thoughts and for the share! :)

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  5. Nothing more to add ; you've said it all and it was perfect !

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    1. You're welcome. Thanks for stopping by to comment! :)

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  7. I think you've summed it up beautifully. I leave a lot of comments as well as receive quite a few comments and am always grateful for my readers. I believe that if you follow the "do unto others" rule and act like a lady or gentleman, you can never go wrong.
    Sam

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    1. Sam, That's so true! Thanks for stopping by to leave a comment today! :)

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  8. This is just sheer brilliance, Karla. Thank you for the post-you've said it so well. I couldn't agree more about taking the time to comment, especially if you took something valuable away from another blogger's time spent. Thank YOU for always being a sweet commenter on MY blog. You are a dear!

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    1. Thank you so much, Erin! You are most welcome. :) You are one of the best blog writers I've come across to date. There is always so much depth and thought put into each beautiful post. I find myself blessed by your posts on a regular basis. XO ~Karla

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    2. Thank you, sweet Karla, that made my day.

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  9. As a fairly new social blogger, I appreciate your post... and knowing that others feel the same way I do. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. :)

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    1. Thank you so much! :)I really appreciate you tweeting about my post as well, such a pleasant surprise!

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  10. Very well said..I just found your site from Pinterest...And so far, from what I just read, I like you and your blog already!..

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    1. Hi Alisa, I'm so glad you found me on Pinterest! Aw, you are so sweet! :) Welcome to my blog!

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  11. i just discovered your blog and i'm loving it! :)
    Wanna follow each other? xoxo
    Have a lovely day!

    http://simplement-heureuse.blogspot.ro/

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    1. Thanks so much for stopping by and leaving a comment. I'm glad you're enjoying my blog! :) I'll pop by and visit your blog also!

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  12. Aww... these are really thoughtful! I am so puzzled when i read peoples comments and they have links to every social media platform! If I want to follow you on twitter, I will go to your blog and find the link! lol

    But you're right some people have no manners. i also find it ironic when people post comments that have nothing to do with the post because they did not read the post. They just commented for the sake of commenting.

    Anyway, i read your entire post lol. great job and blog!
    -A

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    1. Thank you A! LOL! Yes, I feel the same way about social media links. That is one thing I've noticed too, some people just comment because they think somehow the person's blog they wrote on will follow them/visit their page, etc. it would appear. Great points! Thanks for reading the entire post. :)

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  13. thank you so much you are really inspiring me a lot , as i am a new blogger :)

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    1. I'm so glad to hear it! Thanks for taking the time to tell me so! :)

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  14. Karla,
    I've been missing your tweets on twitter so I've not read in awhile. I also think it's being home in the summer with two kids. I've caught up with four posts, and I enjoy your content. So, I'm going to put you in my reader now. I do fall behind in that platform, but I eventually catch up.

    I was going to say, "I hope you are well!", but since I saw that may not be a good thing to say in another post, I'll just say that I hope you're enjoying your summer thus far, and I'll be back.

    Leigh

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    1. Thank you so much, Leigh!! I appreciate you putting me in your reader. I am enjoying my summer and your comment made me laugh. lol.

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  15. If I read or post on a blog it's because I love it. I don't understand ranting on a blog. Well, I suppose I do understand. Some enjoy that sort of negativity - they feed on it.

    Anyway, I'm a new follower and I'm enjoying your blog.

    Rosemary

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    1. Hi Rosemary, thanks for commenting! I feel the same way you do about commenting. I don't understand ranting on another's blog but as you mentioned, some feed on negativity. I'm so glad to have you here and that you are enjoying the blog! :)

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  16. You have explained all the points so well. These days there is a lot unwanted negativity and drama in the cyber space. I wish people treated each other better.

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    1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts! I too wish people treated each other better....

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  17. hi, i just joined the blog world this year and thank you so much. This is helpful and really inspiring me a lot.

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    1. I'm so glad that this post inspired you, Irene! Welcome to the blog world and best of success in your blogging! :)

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  18. Dear Karla,
    Greetings
    Am writing from India, a gentleman taking the liberty to intrude into what is perhaps a ladies domain.
    The world and humanity will be a kinder, more graceful and better place when we imbibe these values !
    Lady, I can feel the inner radiance and the lovely fragrance of your parents, schooling, teachers and friends.
    God Bless
    KJS Sandhu
    Colonel(Retd) Indian Armed Forces Veteran
    silvercloud64@hotmail.com

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Thanks for stopping by, your comments make my day! I read every single one and will answer any questions you have. I hope you'll visit again soon! :) I look forward to reading your positive, inspiring and interesting thoughts! *Please note I remove all spam which includes shameless self-promoted posts with blog/website links. This comment space is for quality dialogue, not advertising.

Warmly,
Karla

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