Thursday, October 6, 2011

Never Say Never

Don't worry, this isn't a post about Justin Beiber. ;) Although, I do like the words of the song he sings titled 'Never Say Never' which inspires us all to move forward, ignoring the nay-sayers so we can reach our destiny!

Those words 'never say never' mean a lot to me. I can count the times I've been amazed by others sacrifices, discipline or circumstances and said something like 'Oh, I don't think I could ever share one car.' This of course was before getting married because as many of you well know, that is the current car status in this casa. OR 'I would never want to work in shifts or late night hours.' You guessed it, I'm now doing that too so I've learned to never say never when it comes to anything because when I do it's as if I've just tossed a challenge for myself up to heavens that inevitably comes to fruition. lol.

How many times have we  heard people refer to someone else and us the word 'never' as it pertains to them getting a better job, losing weight, quitting smoking, upgrading their education, finally breaking free from a bad relationship, getting their finances in order, etc?

As friends, family and colleagues we have a responsibility to be supportive and uplift others. Gracious, merciful and uplifting are some of the traits of a classy woman. She is not the one sitting in the corner whispering and gossiping with her friends about how bad Suzie's marriage is and how she'll never be strong enough to leave her abusive husband. A classy woman offers encouragement, and takes the time to inspire others and offer support. It doesn't have to be all-consuming but in order to see people change for the better we have to first believe in them, even when they may not care or may not believe in themselves. Tell the people you care about that you know they have what it takes and that they can do it!

When my next-door-neighbor first moved in I learned really quickly that they are not a family who recycles. Daily I'd hear the clanking of glass bottles being tossed into the trash and wondered why with such great recycling facilities in our city, someone would want all of those items to go to the landfill. This went on for the past two years but I always secretly hoped and believed that they could finally see the light by watching enough other neighbors on our street bring theirs to the curb and by my own example as our pick up locations are side-by-side. I had put it out of my mind until a couple weeks ago when I drove home from work and saw a bin full of glass bottles sitting at the end of the curb. I was so excited to see they had finally begun recycling and they've since continued their efforts! Their change is what inspired this post. It was a reminder that we can never say never, write someone off or believe they'll never change. Even after years of the same attitude, behavior, poor choices, reverting to old ways, laziness or fill in the blank, people can and do change, we have to be willing to cheer them on and never give up!

Right after seeing the good news about my neighbors I met with a close girlfriend for lunch. We talked about many things and I shared the recycling story. She shared with me that her carnivore hubby who is a meat and potatoes guy and does not enjoy veggies and would avoid them at all costs for as long as I've known her has started to make the switch. She told me one evening she prepared some fish for dinner but was too busy to make the veggie side dish and he actually asked her, "No veggies tonight?" She though he would be excited but she commented that he actually seemed disappointed. You see, for the past 4 years that we've known each other I've known her to slowly introduce new things for her hubby and sneak veggies in wherever she could. He was not interested and cared little about the health benefits, etc. She did know one thing, he was receptive to facts, statistics and science as he is a math kind of guy. Instead of preaching about produce to him, they watched a few documentaries about food and how it's grown, the soil quality and our overall health and why veggies in particular are so important and now he doesn't go a day without them. This is a guy that I once watched polish off a 16-oz rib eye while dining together like it was nobody's business and left all the veggies on the plate! My friend is so happy so all of you moms out there who cannot get your kiddos to eat their veggies, don't give up, you're one step closer, keep up the good work!

Seeing someone else change begins with us, it begins with our attitude, our mindset and our own beliefs as well as being an example to others also. You may not know how this shift in someone will take place but just begin praying for them and believing in them and it will.

"We meet thousands of people, and none of them really touch you and then you meet one person, and your life is changed. Forever." ~Unknown

Is there someone in your life that you have a 'never' kind of mentality about? Change is possible and it's around the corner!



  1. Excellent and very poignant Karla! Your note meant so much to me.

    Thank you for being a friend. We share a lot of the same beliefs...


    Art by Karena

  2. Such an important post! I personally needed to hear it. Sandra

  3. Couldn't find your email address! goes in front of the whole world...I'd like to run this, or part of it, as a guest post linking back to you. I think we may have done something similar before. Visit and let me know. Formerly known as Healthier and More Prosperous Living.

  4. Gosh! this is so timely for me Karla. I always thought my Dad would never change some of his most selfish traits which were causing huge problems in our relationship. Well, a leopard NEVER changes his spots does he? Or does he? I read somewhere that until I asked for forgiveness (for my part) and stopped fighting against the traits I hated, things would never change. So I prayed for guidance, and literally decided to just "suck it up". Guess what? Yep! you've guessed right. My father has done a 360º turn which I never thought I would live to see.
    I also said I would never return to the UK. Guess what I will be doing next year? Returning to look after aforementioned "leopard" ;-)
    What a fantastic post.

  5. Thanks Karena! I'm so glad to meet someone else who shares the same beliefs. :)

    @Sandra-I'm glad you enjoyed it and that it was timely for you! Yes, absolutely, I'd love to do a guest post on your blog again, feel free to post and link away! ;)

    @Vanessa- Wow, that is awesome Vanessa! That is an incredible story about your dad. How wonderful that you'll be right by his side very soon. Sometimes it's the most difficult people in our lives that can surprise us the most! :)



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